Period: January 2014 - March 2014
In the new year I started to pull myself together a little bit. I still enjoyed being alone more than being in company, but I forced myself to accept invitations to socialise. The big difference was the fact that for the first time in several years I had been able to enjoy a normal Christmas and New Year, without the stress of worrying that every little thing I ate would make me feel unwell.
Until now, I guess I had been hoping that the Infliximab would continue to improve my health, but instead I had reached a point where I realised that this was as good as it was going to get. I suppose a part of me had held on to the hope that I would be as fortunate as my brother and essentially make a complete recovery (that said, while I have been typing this he just had a fart or poop moment and had to throw away his second pair of underwear in month, I shouldn't laugh but he is an ass so I can't help myself!).
Instead of waiting for things to get better, I started to accept that my bodily functions would always be a little bit unusual and, while I didn't always feel great, I should appreciate the times when I did feel good. Furthermore, for so long I had refused to settle down and make some roots because I had always held on to the hope that I would be going backpacking again, but I was now begrudgingly accepting that this was my life and it was time I started making the best of it. Therefore, I spent January deciding what I could do to make myself feel better (i.e. improve my confidence and motivation) by spending the money I had been saving for my travels. I guess even my extraordinary self-denial had to face up to reality sooner or later.
Instead of waiting for things to get better, I started to accept that my bodily functions would always be a little bit unusual and, while I didn't always feel great, I should appreciate the times when I did feel good. Furthermore, for so long I had refused to settle down and make some roots because I had always held on to the hope that I would be going backpacking again, but I was now begrudgingly accepting that this was my life and it was time I started making the best of it. Therefore, I spent January deciding what I could do to make myself feel better (i.e. improve my confidence and motivation) by spending the money I had been saving for my travels. I guess even my extraordinary self-denial had to face up to reality sooner or later.
With my health as good as it would ever be, I wanted to move on from the last few years and start afresh. It suddenly felt like I had been waiting for this moment for a very long time and I threw myself in to the effort 100%. I have never had much luck with cars, but then again I had never spent more than a few hundred pounds on a vehicle before. My previous old banger had died on me a few months before and it had become a nightmare travelling the 20-mile round trip to work by bus. Therefore, on the 1st of February I spent £2000 on a car. Furthermore, knowing that the unpredictable hours in my chosen industry of hospitality were not particularly conducive to a healthy routine, I also decided to follow my interest in Human Resources. I enrolled on a pricey Human Resources Diploma, handed in my notice at work and started looking for appropriate jobs all over the county (yes I realise I seem a bit bipolar right about now!).
No comments:
Post a Comment